Don't get me wrong, I love the Skepta song. But when I'm looking at boards of councilors, trustees, management, governors. Any role with power and influence really. That song creeps into mind. Looking at the same white, 50ish year old face again and again.
You know the type... too scared to buy his wife tampons, has plenty of money but never tips, definitely votes tory and claims that eating spaghetti bolognaise and the odd curry means he isn't racist.
Just to be clear it's not that I hate men. Unfortunately I really like people in general and do try to see the best in people where possible. Hence why my sweeping generalizing statement earlier was oh so flattering.
It's just that lack of flavor, that repetition, doesn't reflect life. So why do they get to make the decisions still. I never really questioned it before or at least never noticed that every panel looks exactly the same. But as my career has progressed and I have become more aware of the world around me, it's really started to bother me.
How does any one stand a chance of progressing if they don't fit in that club. Whether they dislike you for having a vagina, being a woman, or not being white, or being an ally to humanity. Like any of those things affect someone's ability to work hard, to make decisions. It's really hard sometimes not to become disheartened with it all. I want to progress, I want to be sat at that top table but if I get there, I'm changing the rules to the club.
Sometimes it feels like the only way to be successful is to play that game, be what they expect you to be. In my case, a subservient daughter in law or second wife, to stand behind my successful man and maybe guide his decisions while I make him breakfast, iron his suit and lie back and think of England during unsatisfying male focused sex.
It's just so not me.
I want to change their minds. I want to make them see how valuable people are. Especially the people they don't expect. Or just wait for the last of the dinosaurs to go extinct and celebrate afterwards. I want to carve my own path. To inspire others to do the same. If you counted every human being on the planet, demographically they are no more special than anyone else.
I just want to my chance to make a difference